Distributing information in a digital world concept - bubble radiating mail envelopes

Computers, Humour, Technology

The SMART Exchange Alias – A Cautionary Tale

No Comments 05 December 2016

Years ago when I was working for SMART Technologies, I noticed something strange during my second week of work as Social Media Specialist that would transform my perception, cause me to look at things from more than one angle and to not always trust process.

Before I explained what I noticed and the impact it had on SMART’s community, I’ll explain the process behind how emails at SMART were created.

The standard email format for new users, based on my experience, is to create an alias that is a combination of the users’ first name initial and their full last name. At SMART, my email alias was RMCLEOD. I think it’s important for an email alias to be memorable to the user, easy to remember for anyone that person does business with and unique amongst the other users of an organization. One of the main problems is when another person with the same first name initial and same last name as a user already in the system is hired. For example, if SMART were to have hired someone named Ruth McLeod, they would have to distinguish her alias perhaps by adding a number (i.e. RMCLEOD1). Something that this process doesn’t account for is the potential formation of new words by combining first name initial with the last name. And why should it right?

Well, the main reason is that an email alias has an impact on perception, professionalism and behind the scenes, the ISP spam server.

For example, someone named Irene Diot would have the alias IDIOT. So, although the system would have no issue creating this alias, you would hope that someone in the IT department or HR would notice this alias and make an adjustment.

With all of this being said, what happened during my second week at SMART was a result of the email alias creation process.

One of my roles was to manage the SMART Exchange, which is a forum for teachers and educators (really anyone in the education realm who uses a SMARTBoard) to share ideas, upload & download lessons plans designed for the SMARTBoard and interact with other users.

However, when I started digging around, I noticed that a large majority of the users’ last login was the same date and time as when their account had been created. This was a big problem because it was showing that user engagement was extremely low. Normally you would expect this from only a small percentage of users so the fact that it was a large majority told me that there was something going on with the SMART Exchange.

What that turned out to be wasn’t anything I could have ever imagined however.

A few days later I was going through some of my emails and happened to look at the headers which provide technical information on the email. I noticed the alias for the SMART Exchange and I immediately knew there was a problem.

smartexchange

 

 

 

If you remember the process behind email aliases, you’ll get where I’m going with this. Although “S Exchange” doesn’t mean much, the alias as it’s read does – “sexchange”.

As you can imagine, when a teacher receives an email from the SMART Exchange confirming their registration from the email address “sexchange@smarttech.com”, the spam filter should pick up “sex” and not allow that email through, which means the teacher would never receive their confirmation email and would therefore not be able to login to the forum. Which is exactly what happened. I won’t go into details of what happened from that point on but suffice it to say that the alias and email address had been in use for more than 1 year.

I share this story as a cautionary tale in two ways.

First, always work through any process that is setup, especially an automated process that will exist across thousands of records and look at what the worst case scenario would be.

Secondly, DON’T require email confirmation or approval when people are trying to join your service. If they register for your service that means they are ENGAGED. Don’t run the risk of losing them by requiring more work on their part – let them to use your service immediately after registering. Use a Captcha or equivalent verification system upon registering. It’s not worth the impact to your service.

facts-not-fiction

Humour, Misc

42 Odd Facts You Might Not Know

No Comments 16 December 2013

The pictures sum it up pretty well. Next time you’re at a party, impress your friends with some of these odd facts. Enjoy!

PascTieShoes

Humour, Misc

You Tie Your Shoes Wrong

No Comments 30 August 2013

As the title suggest, you [probably] tie your shoes wrong. What do I mean by that? There’s more than one to tie your shoes? Well, yes in fact there is. Instead of going one way around the bunny ear you make when doing a loop, just go the other way. Seems simple enough right? Try it out. It’s not.

But in all seriousness, there are many things we probably don’t do “right”. Check out the TED Talk by Terry Moore as he demonstrates the “right” way to tie your shoes. They will come undone much less than normal, saving you time in the process (and possibly saving you from tripping on your laces). Try it out!

Humour, Misc, Thoughts

How Alone Time is Critical to Reaching Creative Flow

No Comments 29 May 2011

I was given a challenge. Well no, more a request. It first was born in a joking complaint. To which I called her out and told her if she gave me a topic to write about, that I would indeed. Well she gave me a topic, and so here I am keeping up my side of the deal. And you know what? I got lucky. She gave me a topic that we’ve discussed many times before. That I love to talk + think about. So I’m greatful for her giving me something that I love to write about.

As the title implies, she (and I as well) believe that alone time is critical to reaching creative flow. To me, this means several things and I will not only explain what I think but I’ll also pull in some great quotes that really express parts of this thinking quite well.

First of all, I think that one of the most important things you can do alone is also one of the most simple and basic human needs. That need is sleep. Every since I can remember, I’ve gone to bed at night tired and woke up rested. For me, sleep has always been important but it’s also been the one constant that I can compromise on if I need more time in my day. However, as I’ve learned more than once, I can only compromise on my sleep for so long until it really starts to affect my mood, my productivity and my relationships.

Lack of sleep affects my mood because when I wake up tired, I don’t feel energized and ready to give the day my best. This leads to me being cranky later on during the day, wanting to sleep and not be very sociable. Which ultimately affects my productivity at work, my productivity on my projects, my ability to work out and be healthy and this leads to a negative effect on my relationships since if I’m not at my best for me, then I can’t be at my best for them.

Another part of alone time means being able to make the time to do something you love to do, on your own. For me this means playing disc golf, throwing a frisbee, going for a run, getting in a workout, watching a movie, reading a book or just sitting and dreaming. If I don’t have the chance to do these on a regular basis, I feel disconnected from myself and I feel out of balance. I love all of those things because I’m good at them, I find them relaxing, I enjoy doing them and they bring balance to my life. Without balance in my life, I’m not able to tackle everything else as effectively and this also affects my productivity. Some people will say “too much of anything isn’t good” and I mostly agree with that. Sometimes you need a lot of something. Other times, not so much. But it’s all about knowing yourself and knowing what you need to create that inner balance for yourself.

Don’t let others throw that balance off. There are people who are energy takers. They will try to get you to spend time with them by making you feel bad for doing other things. That is not a good friend. A good friend will respect you and what you are passionate about. A good friend will miss you but won’t hold it against you if you haven’t seen them in a while. Stay away from those people –  you have a right to have dreams and goals and to go after them. Don’t let others hold you back. Surround yourself with people who will support you and help lift you up instead of dragging you down.

Another way that being alone is good is that many of us who are passionate + motivated will also be creative. And we will always have many ideas swirling around in our head all of the time. When we don’t have time with ourselves to sift through all of our ideas and attempt to quantify them, then those ideas won’t be able to progress past just being in our head. Only when we have alone time will we be able to figure out which ideas we’d like to spend more time on, which ideas aren’t the right ones for right now and which ones won’t really work. Being creative is about taking your skills doing different things with them. And about looking at what projects you’re currently involved in and how you can put your own touch on them, how you can take those projects to the next level and how you can do something different that noone else has done with them yet.

I found this great quote by Helen Hayes

We live in a very tense society. We are pulled apart… and we all need to learn how to pull ourselves together…. I think that at least part of the answer lies in solitude.

Creating a balance in ourselves, and learning to love ourselves, comes from leaving all the distractions of everyday life behind and spending time with yourself. Just because something is a distraction doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing. There are many great distractions in your life. Your kids, your sports, your spouse, your passions. But when we are alone and not letting those distractions invade our consciousness at least for a bit of time regularly, we have the ability to, as Helen says, “pull ourselves together”.

My dad really said it best once when I told him about someone in my past who “completed me”. Yes I know it was a cheesy line from a movie but bear with me. He said “that’s great, but wouldn’t it be better if you and her made 2 wholes instead of just one?” That has stuck with me almost 5 years later because he said it so simply and he was absolutely right. We can never be good for someone until we are good for ourselves. Alone time is a big key to that.

I think many of us have heard this before, and many of us believe it, but given all of the bullshit in the world today, it can be very easy to become disillusioned, lost, confused and lose faith. A big part of that are the words we use and what they mean to us. Paul Johannes Tillich said it best when he said:

Language… has created the word loneliness to express the pain of being alone. And it has created the word solitude to express the glory of being alone.

He’s really right though isn’t he? It’s all about how we choose to look at something. Some of us will see the glass as half empty – some of us will see it as half full.

I choose to just get up and fill the glass with water – then I don’t have to worry about the water level.

Flow. Like. Water.

Humour, Thoughts

Greatest Thing Ever…1 Cent Ribs

No Comments 13 January 2010

Seriously.

Every Wednesday at the Joyce on 4th in Calgary. There are other places too (all owned by the same group of owners). But what a fantastic idea. 1 cent ribs. And then of course they make all their money off the beer and pop. Pfffft. But still.

How would you feel if you went out for 7 cent ribs and I told you I was only spending 1 cent on my ribs? Would you feel ripped off? Because I think it’s awesome.

When’s the last time you could buy anything for 1 cent? 1 cent candies haven’t been around for years. They’re now 1o cents most places – some still offer them for 5 cents, but 1 cent? Not a chance.

The next time you’re eating 7 cent ribs, I ask you…what would you do with an extra 6 cents per rib?

Humour, Thoughts

The Joy of Parking

No Comments 20 November 2009

Parking is, to put it lightly, annoying.

Think about what parking is. Your car is sitting on the ground. Yet you have to pay for it to sit on the ground. Maybe you could have like a time share system. You use someone else’s parking spot downtown and they use your spot somewhere else.

Have you ever seen those garage type parking systems? Like the one in the pic. They’re so sweet. Efficient since all of the spaces are optimized to fit a car and there’s no wasted space. But, what happens if your car becomes like a chocolate bar in a vending machine and gets stuck halfway out? Then convenience and efficiency turns into hassle.

I get why we’re charged for parking. And I understand that people have come to expect to pay for parking. But honestly can’t they make money another way? The amount we spend on vehicles is high enough already between car payments, insurance and gas so why not cut us a break?

I think the government should do something about it. For university students, it’s outrageous how much they have to spend to park to go to school. No wonder so many people try to park for free and get tickets for risking it.

Humour, Misc, Thoughts

Random Food Combinations

No Comments 17 October 2009

Do you know what I mean? Like when you eat ice cream while having a beer? Some think it’s strange. I think it makes perfect sense. Eating good things together can only equal goodness. Well, in theory right? Here are some more of the food combos I like. What are yours?

  • Soda crackers and yogurt
  • Peanut butter and chocolate chips sandwich
  • Peanut butter and chocolate chip cookie sandwich
  • Soda crackers, yogurt and chocolate easter eggs
  • Soda crackers and ice cream
  • Soup and pasta
  • Chicken and cream of mushroom soup
  • Cheese Whiz and sandwich spread (smelled like salmon…odd)
  • Soda crackers dipped in chocolate pudding
  • Rice cakes dipped in chocolate pudding

It’s fun trying new combinations. Leads to trying new food. And not being nervous about really eating anything. Try it sometime. And if you ever have me over for dinner, make sure you have lots of soda crackers, beer and ice cream for dessert.

Humour, Misc, TED, Thoughts

The Ham Butt Problem

No Comments 28 July 2009

The Ham Butt Problem (taken from: http://www.ted.com/talks/erin_mckean_redefines_the_dictionary.html):

Woman’s making a ham for the big family dinner. She goes to cut the butt off the ham and throw it away, and she looks at this piece of ham and she’s like, “This is a perfectly good piece of ham. Why am I throwing this away?” She thought, “Well my mom always did this.” So she calls up Mom, and she says, “Mom, why’d you cut the butt off the ham when you’re making a ham?” Her mom says, “I don’t know, my mom always did it!” So they call Grandma, and Grandma says, “My pan was too small!”

How many times have we heard this before? We do something because that’s how it’s always been done. As much as it’s efficient as a species to learn from experience, sometimes our experience can be based on factors which no longer exist or no longer influence our decisions. How best do we approach a problem without letting the past influence us too much? Simple. Think about why you do what you do. If something seems a bit off, there’s probably a reason for that.

As Einstein famously said, “We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we used when we created them.”

Live and think consciously. You never know when you’re going to be cooking a ham.

Disc Sports, Family, Humour, Maritimes, Misc, Thoughts

25 Facts About Me (extended edition)

No Comments 10 February 2009

1. I have many passions but for the past 8 years, it’s been ultimate Frisbee. I frequently dream about playing ultimate. Whenever I see a green field, I think “Wow, that would be a great field to play on.”

2. I miss my mom more than anything in the world. She passed away in 2001 when I was 18 and it still hurts to think about it. She was the most important person in my life and I can honestly say that she was the most honest, most sincere, nicest, most caring person I’ve ever met. And I was lucky enough to have her as my mom. That makes me happy but also hurts that she’s gone.

3. My first love is golf, and I miss playing so much. The last time spent with my mom was on mother’s day when we went golfing. I’ve dreamt of playing pro golf for a long time.

4. I cry during movies. Sometimes. Shhhhh.

5. I’ve never been outside of North America, but I’ve been all over Canada more than most people.

6. I drank for the first time when I was 16 at the prom party for the grade 12’s (I was in grade 11). And the first thing I ever drank was coolers. Which continued to be my bevy of choice; until I got drunk off 3 Mike’s hard when I was 18 and that was the end of coolers.

7. I haven’t weighed less than 200 pounds in almost 6 years, but I can still beat you in a race…

8. I bought my first car ever in Oct of 2007. I miss rollerblading to get around and I think since I’m living downtown now I will do more of that this summer.

9. I miss my family a lot but since it’s so expensive to fly home to the Maritimes, I haven’t gone since Dec 2006. I’m going to go this year and really want to go to our family cottage in PEI.

10. I’m extremely proud to have grown up in the Maritimes and would raise my family there in a heartbeat. I love Calgary and the people here but it’s not the same. If you’ve ever been there, you’ll know what I mean.

11. I’m a very honest person. Sometimes too honest. But that’s how I am and I will live and die by that sword.

12. I have an addiction for Haagen Daas ice cream. The 500ml variety. My favourite kind is chocolate chocolate chip and it made me very sad when they stopped selling it in Canada so whenever I’m in the US for a Frisbee tournament, I try and eat it.

13. One of my favourite things to do is to go to an open field and throw Frisbees. Like, I’ll bring 8 with me. And throw for 2 hours. By myself. It’s almost like my form of meditation. Ask me to go throw sometime and you better believe I’m there.

14. I think Frisbee golf is one of the best sports ever. Especially when me and the boys play the Majestic. Ask me about the Majestic and maybe I’ll tell you. If you’re lucky enough.

15. Rhubarb is to me what shrimp is to Bubba Gump.

16. I have built 3 of my own computers. I learned by watching other people and reading about it online. It’s fun being able to do that. But ask me about cars, and I have no clue. But I can bullshit and pretend I know what I’m talking about…sort of.

17. I have been designing websites for 6 years and my proudest accomplishment was doing the Umbilical Brothers website for 4 years. They are 2 hilarious guys from Australia who do shows all over the world and I still haven’t met them. But they might be in New York in April/May and I am planning that trip already. I am beyond pumped to meet them. And to see my good friend Deb (whom I met through the forum I built for their website).

18. I have been on television 3 times. And recognized once from an appearance. For being on Street Cents, when I was living in Halifax. I felt like a celebrity. It was pretty special.

19. I have a plastic canvas calendar sitting in my drawer which I started over 8 years ago. I want to finish it one day. It’s an Olympic themed calendar. Maybe I’ll try to have it done by the 2010 games.

20. I can throw a Frisbee longer than a football field.

21. I once shaved my whole body. It took a really long time and I probably wouldn’t do it again. But I liked how my muscles looked really defined, haha I used the shaver from https://factschronicle.com/best-electric-razors-of-2017-revamping-your-outlook-by-shaving-1377.html, even though it was meant to be only for my beard. But I didn’t like how itchy it was when the hair started growing back in.

22. I’ve dyed my hair blond twice. Once it turned orange because I didn’t have enough dye. The other time it was very light and I liked it. Would I do it again? Why not?

23. I used to be really really funny in grade 8. Like make people fall out of their chairs laughing funny. Then in the summer between grade 8 and 9 I grew up. I remember reading Sphere by Michael Crichton and feeling more mature. I still make people laugh. But not like grade 8, oh man.

24. I love dogs. Like I can’t wait to have a house with a yard so I can get a dog. I think they’re the greatest pet ever.

25. Since I’ve been told I’m random, I’ll throw in a very random fact. I was suspended in grade 3 for one day because I pulled a knife on a kid. It was my grandfather’s and I happened to have it in my pocket. Not sure why I did it. But I haven’t done it since.

Humour, Thoughts, Weather

Melty Snow

No Comments 13 January 2009

I curse you warm weather and melty snow for making mine and my friend’s lives so annoying.

Why won’t you just disappear altogether so we don’t constantly get stuck trying to park on the streets where we live?

Why can’t you just let our tires get enough grip so we can drive away?

Why do you feel like you need to make our tires spin?

a) so we can smell the smell of burning rubber?
b) so our neighbours can come and be neighbourly?
c) so we’ll buy winter tires?

I pick c).

I think it’s a conspiracy. I think tire manufacturers made it get warm and started the melty snow so we would consider buying winter tires.

Well guess what Michelin, Goodyear, Bridgestone, Pirelli, etc etc etc. You won’t win this round. Oh no. I will push my own car if I have to, but I will not buy winter tires. You’ll just have to find a more effective way of marketing to me. I don’t like such a vicious approach.

Please melty snow, go away.

Humour, Thoughts, Weather

It’s That Time of the Year…

No Comments 21 December 2008

When it’s -29 degrees outside…and -13 is a nice, warm day.

When you eat far more than you should but you do it because you want to get a taste for everything (cranberry sauce, dressing, turkey, potatoes, peas, corn, beets, pickles, squash, dessert, etc………). And then take a nap.

When you scrape enough of your windshield so you can see what’s in front of you so you can drive to work.

When you go outside and your hair, still wet from the shower, instantly freezes.

When you go to bed with long johns, socks, a hoodie and gloves on, and you’re still cold

When it’s better to be warm then it is to look cool…but people still try and look cool…which really means…cold.

When most streets are lined with cars that haven’t moved in a week and are not only covered in snow but also have a snowbank on 3 sides of the car and have no chance of driving away without some serious snow shoveling.

Add your own………..

Humour, Thoughts

World Philosophy Day – Four philosophical questions to make you think

No Comments 20 November 2008

As the title alludes to, today is World Philosophy Day. For those of you who know me really well you’ll know that I like those questions that really make your brain hurt. The questions relating to the universe, the What If questions and the questions that may seem silly but really are tough to answer (What would chairs look like if our knees bent the other way?). I love these kind of questions. I took a philosophy course last year and our prof asked us some really tough ones. Several of which I still haven’t been able to come up with an answer to for which I’m happy with. On that note, the BBC provides 4 philosophical questions to make your brain hurt:

1. SHOULD WE KILL HEALTHY PEOPLE FOR THEIR ORGANS?

Suppose Bill is a healthy man without family or loved ones. Would it be ok painlessly to kill him if his organs would save five people, one of whom needs a heart, another a kidney, and so on? If not, why not?

Consider another case: you and six others are kidnapped, and the kidnapper somehow persuades you that if you shoot dead one of the other hostages, he will set the remaining five free, whereas if you do not, he will shoot all six. (Either way, he’ll release you.)

If in this case you should kill one to save five, why not in the previous, organs case? If in this case too you have qualms, consider yet another: you’re in the cab of a runaway tram and see five people tied to the track ahead. You have the option of sending the tram on to the track forking off to the left, on which only one person is tied. Surely you should send the tram left, killing one to save five.

But then why not kill Bill?

2. ARE YOU THE SAME PERSON WHO STARTED READING THIS ARTICLE?

Consider a photo of someone you think is you eight years ago. What makes that person you? You might say he she was composed of the same cells as you now. But most of your cells are replaced every seven years. You might instead say you’re an organism, a particular human being, and that organisms can survive cell replacement – this oak being the same tree as the sapling I planted last year.

But are you really an entire human being? If surgeons swapped George Bush’s brain for yours, surely the Bush look-alike, recovering from the operation in the White House, would be you. Hence it is tempting to say that you are a human brain, not a human being.

But why the brain and not the spleen? Presumably because the brain supports your mental states, eg your hopes, fears, beliefs, values, and memories. But then it looks like it’s actually those mental states that count, not the brain supporting them. So the view is that even if the surgeons didn’t implant your brain in Bush’s skull, but merely scanned it, wiped it, and then imprinted its states on to Bush’s pre-wiped brain, the Bush look-alike recovering in the White House would again be you.

But the view faces a problem: what if surgeons imprinted your mental states on two pre-wiped brains: George Bush’s and Gordon Brown’s? Would you be in the White House or in Downing Street? There’s nothing on which to base a sensible choice. Yet one person cannot be in two places at once.

In the end, then, no attempt to make sense of your continued existence over time works. You are not the person who started reading this article.

3. IS THAT REALLY A COMPUTER SCREEN IN FRONT OF YOU?

What reason do you have to believe there’s a computer screen in front of you? Presumably that you see it, or seem to. But our senses occasionally mislead us. A straight stick half-submerged in water sometimes look bent; two equally long lines sometimes look different lengths.

But this, you might reply, doesn’t show that the senses cannot provide good reasons for beliefs about the world. By analogy, even an imperfect barometer can give you good reason to believe it’s about to rain.

Before relying on the barometer, after all, you might independently check it by going outside to see whether it tends to rain when the barometer indicates that it will. You establish that the barometer is right 99% of the time. After that, surely, its readings can be good reasons to believe it will rain.

Perhaps so, but the analogy fails. For you cannot independently check your senses. You cannot jump outside of the experiences they provide to check they’re generally reliable. So your senses give you no reason at all to believe that there is a computer screen in front of you.”

4. DID YOU REALLY CHOOSE TO READ THIS ARTICLE?

Suppose that Fred existed shortly after the Big Bang. He had unlimited intelligence and memory, and knew all the scientific laws governing the universe and all the properties of every particle that then existed. Thus equipped, billions of years ago, he could have worked out that, eventually, planet Earth would come to exist, that you would too, and that right now you would be reading this article.

After all, even back then he could have worked out all the facts about the location and state of every particle that now exists.

And once those facts are fixed, so is the fact that you are now reading this article. No one’s denying you chose to read this. But your choice had causes (certain events in your brain, for example), which in turn had causes, and so on right back to the Big Bang. So your reading this was predictable by Fred long before you existed. Once you came along, it was already far too late for you to do anything about it.

Now, of course, Fred didn’t really exist, so he didn’t really predict your every move. But the point is: he could have. You might object that modern physics tells us that there is a certain amount of fundamental randomness in the universe, and that this would have upset Fred’s predictions. But is this reassuring? Notice that, in ordinary life, it is precisely when people act unpredictably that we sometimes question whether they have acted freely and responsibly. So freewill begins to look incompatible both with causal determination and with randomness. None of us, then, ever do anything freely and responsibly.”

Humour, Misc, Stupid Questions, Thoughts

Not So Clever Anymore

No Comments 10 September 2008

So my foray into answering some of the stupid questions got old fast. Like after a few days. I just wasn’t interested in answering them anymore and I doubt anyone actually read them. I sometimes wonder, like many do, how visible my blog actually is. Is there anyone who actually reads my blog? Is there anyone who keeps up to date on my site by checking it every so often? The fact that I have not gotten any comments in a long time would suggest the contrary but I am getting visits (I checked my analytics) so something is going on.

Not that I need comments, but it would be neat to read them. Would be neat to hear what people would actually like to hear and read about. I know many times a blog becomes popular because the author picks something unique and obscure to write about and via word of mouth, more people start reading the blog and checking it out more often. Other times, the author knows a great deal about a topic so people are interested in reading about that topic from an expert in that field.

Perhaps I could take a dual approach. Write about something obscure once in a while (such as pinecones and how sticky they make your hands from all of the sap and how this is a problem) and then write about something in which I know a lot about (technology, ultimate, leadership/coaching). Interesting. I think I just came up with a whole plethora of new topics for posts. Stay tuned.

Oh and leave some comments.

Peace.

Humour, Stupid Questions

Series: More Stupid Questions

No Comments 29 August 2008

Q: Do cemetery workers prefer the graveyard shift?
A: They do because at night the temperature is cooler than during the day and it’s less strenuous to work.

Q: How come I can pick my ears but not my nose?
A: Well, because you can blow your nose, but not your ears.

Q: How do they get the “Keep off the Grass” sign on the grass?
A: They hire an Olympic javelin thrower to toss the sign.

Humour, Stupid Questions

Stupid Questions – Things That Make You Go “hmmm”

No Comments 28 August 2008

I’ve decided to start a series of sorts. Kimmie and I stumbled upon a sweet website called, as the title suggests, “Stupid Questions – Things That Make You Go “hmmm””. After reading quite a few of them back and forth, I decided that I would pick one, every day, every other day, whatever, and answer it. Just to make it even more silly.

To commemorate this grand occasion, I will do 4 at once. You know, since 4 is my favourite number. Yeah. Hush you. You know who you are.

~~~~~~~~~~

Q: What do they call a French kiss in France?
A: A francais kiss. Of course

Q: What do you call male ballerinas?
A: Theodore. No offense to the actual guys named that.

Q: What does Geronimo say when he jumps out of a plane?
A: Oh shit?

Q: What happens to an 18 hour bra after 18 hours?
A: Hopefully it gets washed.

~~~~~~~~~~

Stay tuned…

Humour, Thoughts

Ugh…My Head Hurts

No Comments 27 August 2008

Setting: A dark and messy room

Lights down.
Lights up.

There is a bed in the middle of the room. The alarm clock has been beeping for an unknown length of time. Clothes are scattered on the floor. A glass of water, half full, sits on the night table. There is a body lying on the bed, face down, sprawled out. The body, appearing lifeless, slowly moves and lets out a groan.

Unknown figure: God, I pray to you. If you help me get rid of this hangover, I will NEVER ever drink again.

How many times have we uttered this prayer aloud to ourselves? Don’t we realize it is in vain? Why do we say it? Even if we don’t believe in God, do we think he is that powerful that he can magically cure a hangover? Who was the first person to speak these words? I’m sure it has been happening for a while and until a cure is found for hangovers, it will continue to be spoken…

Humour

Comedians

No Comments 04 April 2008

So I’ve been listening to a lot of comedy lately on XM and I started to write down the comic’s name when I heard someone really funny. Plus I already had some comedians that I like. So, I will update this list as it happens, but I highly recommend checking any of them out if you want a laugh!

Mitch Hedberg
George Carlin
Robert Schimmel
Jerry Seinfeld
Steven Wright
Larry the Cable Guy
Tom Rhodes
Mystro Clark
David Feldman
Sam Kinison
Todd Barry
Bob Zany
Dave Anderson
Henry Youngman
Eddie Brill
Willie Barcena
John Bowman
Derek Richards
Bill Burr
Kelly McDonald
Tom Shillue
Mike Merryfield
Brian Posehn
Dave Attell
Larry Miller
Jackie Martling
Brian Regan
Doug Stanhope
Doug Powell
Dane Cook
Rodney Carrington
Modi
Rob Little
Sean Morey
Jeff Caldwell
Frank Calliendo
Daniel Tosh
Tom Pecora
Jim Norton
Buzz Nutley
Derrick Cameron
Jimmy Pardo
Bobby Collins
Dan Levy
Richard Jeni
Drew Hastings
Gallagher
John Pinette
T-Rexx
Margaret Cho
Alonzo Bodden
Jeremy Hotz
Demetri Martin
Jim Gaffigan
Emo Phillips
Bill Burr
Jim Norton
Stephen Lynch
Kathleen Madigan
Greg Fitzsimmons
Jeff Dunham
David Brenner
Sam Kinison
Greg Wilson
Jamie Kilstein
Jim Gaffigan
Redd Foxx
Bobby Slayton
Dobie Maxwell
Jamie Kennedy

Humour, Thoughts, Videos

When You Feel Lost…Reach Waaay Down…Friendly Giant Style

No Comments 01 June 2007

Sometimes we reach a certain period in our lives in which we’ve forgotten our roots. The past few days have felt like such a period. Well don’t fear. I have rediscovered my true self. What is this true self that I speak of. What is it that I’ve forgotten. What is it that truly defines who I am as an individual, both spirtually, mentally, physically, and scentwise? Well, it can really only be one thing. That thing is Kenny Rogers Jackass. I get mopey. That happens when I don’t watch Kenny Rogers Jackass at least once a week. Well, I watched it tonight. Here’s to a fantastic week.

Of particular note, and really the core of my inner being, is the Batfetcher with your teeth. If you haven’t tried it, you really haven’t lived until you’ve caught a Louisville Slugger in your pearly whites.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VV6In1K8zKk

Humour, Misc

90 Random Things About Me

No Comments 04 January 2007

1. What is your passion?
Disc sports (ultimate frisbee, disc golf, dog disc and overalls)

2. What is your favourite beer:
Alexander Keith’s IPA

3. What is your favourite scent?
Lilac

4. What is your favourite movie:
Rudy

5. Do you own a care?
Nope…walking, bus and train for this guy!

6. What is your favourite pet?
A dog for sure…

7. What is your favourite clothing store?
Lululemon, Sears, Memory Express

8. Do you have a phone?
Yes, a crappy flip phone 🙁

9. Desktop or laptop computer?
Desktop

10. Favourite way to download movies?
Torrents

11. Do you hands get cold in the wintertime?
No, I’m like an oven lol

12. Do you have more guy friends or girl friends?
Girl friends

13. When is the last time you saw your mom?
Thursday, May 17, 2001; the night she died. 🙁

14. What color are your eyes?
Green/Brown. Depending on what I’m wearing and perhaps my mood?

15. What time did you wake up today?
Around 10:30, Sheena and I had to start packing since we fly back to Calgary tomorrow.

16. What are you wearing right now?
Brown cotton pants and a striped dress shirt.

17. What’s your favorite Christmas song?
So This Is Christmas by John Lennon.

18. Where is your favorite place to be?
This has changed over the years, but I would have to say that it would be on Wickwire field at Dalhousie University throwing a frisbee.

19. Where is your least favorite place to be?
Sitting in the gym writing a final exam.

20. Where would you go if you could go anywhere?
Africa on a safari or perhaps to New Zealand on a looong tour.

21. Where do you think you’ll be in 10 years?
Hopefully working a sweet job, teaching my kids how to play sports, and still playing ultimate at a high level. Or maybe golf 🙂

22. Do you tan or burn?
Both. Depends on how long I’m outside and if I wear sunscreen or not.

23. What did you fear was going to get you at night as a child?
A fire 🙁

24. What was the last thing that made you laugh?
Watching Sheena walk from the car to the steps. She took a wiiide turn 😛

25. How many TVs do you have?
4

26. How big is your bed?
Queen. Anything smaller suuucks.

27. Do you have a laptop or desktop computer?
Both, although I use my laptop way more than the desktop. Too bad it’s not as easy to upgrade a laptop as it is to upgrade a desktop.

28. Do you sleep with or without clothes on?
On – boxers and an undershirt.

29. What color are your sheets?
Navy blue, green, or gray.

30. How many pillows do you sleep with?
1 for my head and one for between my knees. Sometimes with a body pillow too. That’s a good sleep 🙂

31. What is your favorite season?
Summer. Get to go golfing, play frisbee, and run outside. I’m like a puppy dog in the summertime 🙂 And winter is pretty grand too. Time for hockey and skiing.

32. What do you like about fall?
Crisp air and the smell of leaves.

33. What do you like about winter?
Fresh snow and ice.

34. What do you like about the summer?
Weather.

35. What do you like about spring?
Warm weather but also cool temperature.

36. How many provinces have you lived in?
3 – Alberta, New Brunswick, and Nova Scotia.

37. How many cities/towns have you lived in?
5 – Edmonton, Calgary, Halifax, Woodstock, Ardrossan.

38. Do you prefer shoes, socks, or bare feet?
Shoes with socks.

39. Are you a social person?
Sometimes. Mostly I like to have time for myself though.

40. What was the last thing you ate?
Sunomono, Caesar salad, japanese chicken wings, and Dairy Queen cake (Sheena and I made the food, except for the cake of course, for dinner)

41. What is your favorite restaurant?
Sushi Club in Calgary

42. What is your favorite ice cream?
Chocolate Chocolate Chip – Haagen Daas. They only sell it on the States now so when I’m down there, I eat like one per day! hahaha. Mmmmm.

43. What is your favorite dessert?
Rhubarb crumble.

44. What is your favorite kind of soup?
Chicken noodle soup.

45. What kind of jelly do you like on your PB & J sandwich?
Homemade strawberry jam with the little strawberries.

47. Do you like coffee?
Yuck. Hell no. Water for me.

48. How many glasses of water, a day, do you drink on average?
4 or 5 litres of water minimum. Depends on how much exercise I get.

49. What do you drink in the morning?
Water and sometimes orange juice.

50. Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone?
Depends. With someone is nice, but when I’m actually sleeping, I like to have my own space.

51. Do you sleep on a certain side of the bed?
Against the wall at home, but when I sleep alone, I sleep in the middle.

52. Do you know how to play poker?
Yup.

53. Do you like to cuddle?
Gee let me think. Um, yes.

54. Have you ever been to Canada?
Lol. Nuff said.

55. Do you have an addictive personality?
Not so much.

56. Do you eat out or at home more often?
For the last year, it’s been out more often than in it seems, but with the New Year comes a resolution to change that. Twice per month we’re gonna aim for. That’ll be good.

58. Do you know anyone with the same birthday as you?
Yup, an older lady who’s friends with my grandparents that lives a few houses away from them. She would always send me a birthday card 🙂

59. Do you want kids?
Yup.

60. Do you speak any other languages?
Used to be bilingual in french, but it’s kinda rough now.

61. Have you ever gotten stitches?
3 times in my chin cuz of the stupid new helmets that we wore in high school.

62. Have you ever ridden in an ambulance?
Nope.

63. Do you prefer an ocean or a pool?
Beach cuz you can play frisbee on the shore. But I sorta don’t like the taste of saltwater, so for pure swimming I like the pool.

64. Do you prefer a window seat or an aisle seats?
Window. Although the best seats on the plane are at the emergency exit.

65. Do you know how to drive stick?
Yup.

66. What is your favorite thing to spend money on?
Electronic stuff – mostly for my computer. And eating out. And stuff for ultimate. And dvd’s. Dammit, I love spending money on stuff.

67. Do you wear any jewelry 24/7?
My plantwear watch once in a while. My grad ring even less.

68. What is your favorite TV show?
Smallville, Nip Tuck, and The Apprentice.

69. Can you roll your tongue?
Twist it yes.

70. Who is the funniest person you know?
Elliot.

71. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?
Nope. Just Sheena.

73. Do you still have clothes from when you were little?
Not with me in Calgary, but my dad’s saved some.

74. What color are your bedroom walls?
White.

75. Do you turn off the water while you brush your teeth?
I do. And I turn the water off when Sheena brushes her teeth and it drives her nutty.

76. Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?
I don’t have a closet door. But when I did, it was normally closed.

77. Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of bees?
Bees. You can outrun them. The bear. Well, that’s a different story.

78. Do you flirt a lot?
Um, hrm, once in a while yes.

79. What do you dip a chicken nugget in?
Honey sauce is good.

80. What is your favorite food?
I’d have to say pizza. It’s the most consistent favourite.

81. Can you change the oil on a car?
I do believe I can yes.

82. Have you ever gotten a speeding ticket?
Yup. And almost had a 2nd but the cop who stopped me had the same car and knew how fast it went. Really, he just didn’t want to ticket me I think.

83. Have you ever run out of gas?
Nope. Close yes though. Very very close.

84. What is your usual bedtime?
99% of the time never before midnight. Usually closer to 2 or 3 am.

86. Do you read the newspaper?
Not so often. I read daily news online from slashdot and dailywtf.

87. Do you have any magazine subscriptions?
Men’s Health.

88. Best comedian?
Robert Schimmel and Larry the Cable Guy.

89. Do you watch soap operas?
Yeah, no.

90. Do you dance in the car?
No, but Sheena sure does.


About Rob


Rob "Frisbee Rob" McLeod is a motivational speaker and frisbee ambassador living in Calgary, Alberta, Canada. He competes in ultimate, disc golf, dog disc and overall flying disc competitions. Rob currently holds 6 Guinness World Records, 10 World Championships and the Canadian Distance Record.

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