Something that is tough living so far away from home (roughly 4,500 km actually) is that I don’t really get home much and usually have to make a decision between going home in the summer (better weather and cheaper flights) vs over Christmas (lots of snow, delayed flights and more expensive flights).

For the past 2 years I’ve decided to go home in the summer – which was convenient because my vacation coincided with the Parlee Beach ultimate frisbee tournament in July. It’s such a great time and it’s an easy way to see most of my friends all at once.

However, because of how I was raised and how much Christmas means to me, it is tough being away from them during the holidays. I have so many fond memories of being a kid and waking up on Christmas day, opening presents and playing games with my family.

I try to do as much of that as possible whenever I’m not able to make it home for Christmas but something I’ve realized over the past few years is that family will always be family but close friends and really nice people can be close like family too.

That’s why this year I’m giving a huge shout out to my friends who are going to make this a great Christmas even though I’m not able to spend it with my family in NB. I will still try to call them all on Christmas morning though. And open my gifts from them.

Dang I wish I had a Christmas tree though. Hmmmm. There are a bunch of trees just up the street….

One of my favourite quotes.

What it means to me:

There are things that you can do really well.

There are things that you cannot do very well.

Focus on those things that you can do really well and make it your goal to get ever better at those things.

The things that you can’t do very well – work to get better at them but your life will be much more rewarding if you are amazing at a few things instead of mediocre at many things.

Case in point – I would rather be amazing at 3 sports than pretty good at 6 sports. It lets my passion shine through more completely and I will achieve much more.

Think about those things you’re really good at – how much are you making them your focus?

Not in terms of money…but in terms of life.

Take this quote:

The poor man is not he who is without a cent, but he who is without a dream

So I ask you…what’s your wealth like?

I watched The Rookie a few weeks ago; a movie starring Dennis Quaid. In it, Dennis plays the role of a teacher who chose a career and a family over baseball. However, years later he has another shot at playing in the pros. I thought it was an excellent movie but there was a line that his father said to him that really stood out for me:

“It’s ok to think about what you want to do…until it’s time to start doing what you were meant to do.”

It really hit home inside of me because I find it too easy in life to always be wanting to do something or wanting to have something (the ‘keeping up with the jones’ mentality). But, in life I feel that everyone is meant to do something. For some, it takes longer than others to find out what that is but when you do, I truly feel that you should embrace your calling, be passionate about what you do and give it everything. What you will get back from doing what you love to do will amaze you and will truly enrich your life.

Just something to think about today.

Really think about what the quote means.

Let me know if it’s as powerful to you as it was to me.

Cheers 🙂

Compromise isn’t a bad thing. Although it can be, the type of compromise I’m talking about is healthy compromise.

First of all, what does compromise mean? According to Merriam Webster online, the definition which I find applicable is

something intermediate between or blending qualities of two different things

The reason this definition fits well is that because in any relationship (whether it’s a friendship, a family member, or your spouse) in order to be happy, there will have to be a blending of two different things. Say for example you’re dating someone who loves watching the Bachelorette but you love watching Golf – how can you blend these together? Well, you could let them have their time to watch the Bachelorette and in turn, they would let you watch golf during the final round on Sundays. This would be a hands off compromise. A more involved compromise would be her watching golf with you and you watching the Bachelorette with her. This is a healthier compromise I believe because both partners are taking an interest in each other’s lives (albeit through television, but an interest nonetheless).

With family members, a compromise could involve how often you visit, where you visit, christmas presents, etc…

With friends, a compromise could involve having someone different choose a restaurant/movie each time so the same person isn’t always getting what they want.

The amazing thing with individuals is that everyone has their own unique interests. Many times, whether in a friendship or relationship, these interests will overlap, but the beauty is that when they don’t, you do have the ability to blend those different interests together.

It will make for unexpected situations, discovering new happiness and having a different perspective on everyday things. The next time you are in a situation where a compromise seems like the only option…go for it. You might surprise yourself with how much fun you end up having!

How do you know if you’re doing the right things in order to be happy?

How do you know if you’re doing the right job?
How do you know if you have the right friends?
How do you know if you’re dating the right person?

Well, take a minute to think about any one of these. Are you happy in:

1. Your job? What aren’t you happy about? Can you change your unhappiness?

2. Your friends? What is about them that makes you unhappy? What sort of friendship do you have with them? Is it worth staying friends with them?

3. Your relationship? What makes you unhappy with them/the relationship? Can you change that unhappiness?

The reason I throw these questions at you is that although sometimes your unhappiness does come from external forces,  many times that unhappiness comes from you and how you approach the situation.

In a job, are you working hard? Are you making excuses and blaming others at work? Is there more you can do to make the situation better? Perhaps stay late a few days to get caught up on work and make your boss happier. Remember, as much as your boss is pressuring you to do work, their bosses (who have much bigger paycheques) are also putting pressure on you, so there is always more to the story than you initially might think.

In a friendship, there are two sides – yours and theirs. Friendships can be unbalanced – but it’s up to you to decide if you’re going to accept that. Maybe you’re not the one putting in much effort – or maybe it’s your friend. Whatever the case, be realistic with yourself and realize what type of friendship you have. Choose friends who have a positive influence on your life. It’s not worth hanging around people who put you and/or your friends down. Those people will continue to suck the energy from you as long as you let them – so don’t let them!

In a relationship, like a friendship, there are two sides. However, a relationship involves much more. It involves you making sure the other person feels safe around you and vice versa. That you support them no matter what. That when they want to talk, you’re there to listen. As much as you want to be their best friend, you are also much more than that so you should only be with someone who makes you happy and who you can share your life with. If they don’t want to support you and aren’t excited for your accomplishments, then why are you with them? There is someone out there who would love to do that for you – and you for them.

I find sometimes life gets so busy that we don’t take the time to think about our happiness. I know it happens to me so sometimes you need to do some housecleaning. Take a look at what’s important in your life and decide what you can change to make yourself happier.

It’s possible. For me it happened recently. And I’m glad it did.

To be or not to be…that is the question.

When it comes to volunteering and helping others, it most certainly is.

I strongly believe that there are 2 types of people who volunteer – those who truly want to give their time freely and those who simply put in their time because they think it’ll look good to their peers.

Well that’s fair. I can definitely understand doing something because it enhances your resume or because it gains respect amongst your friends/co-workers.

But what happened to doing something because it was the right thing to do?

I’ve been volunteering because I have the ability to help others. Mostly my volunteer hours have been spent teaching sports to kids. I think that’s due in large part to being involved in sports my whole life and seeing the positive impact they had on my childhood. Having the ability to give back, to me, is the greatest gift of all. And the best thing about giving your time freely to kids is that they appreciate you for doing that. When you show up and give your best to them, you’ll get their best back. It’s an incredible thing.

I also owe a lot of my volunteer spirit to my parents, both of whom I was very lucky to have had growing up. Whenever Mother’s Day is near, I reflect back on my time spent with my mom and I realize just how lucky I was to have had a mother who gave so much of herself to make sure I had the opportunities that I had – it was truly incredible.

I ask you to think about why you do/don’t volunteer. I’d love to hear your inspirations/stories!

Everyone I know listens to music and loves at least one genre. There are also many people who hate certain types of music (some examples of people I know are country and heavy metal haters). But that doesn’t mean that any certain type of music is “bad”. And, for popular artists (ie Nickelback, Celine Dion) I always find it interesting when people say that they hate them because they’re “bad”. Or that all of Nickelback’s songs sound the same. Or that other people don’t know good music.

Well, I think those people are foolish and silly.  Who can really say if a band as big as Nickelback is bad? They’re not. Millions of people love them (myself included). There aren’t any bands that I “hate”. Rarely can you find a band/type of music who I won’t listen to. I appreciate them for what they are – artists. They are doing what they love to do and there are many of them who are really good at what they do.

I give props to anyone who writes music, performs in front of thousands of people, produces an album, etc. They exist as they do because they entertain us and some of them do it so well that they are very very rich. Who wouldn’t want to do what they love and make a lot of money from it? I certainly wouldn’t complain.

I just find it really tiring, annoying and a waste for when people have so much hatred for something. If you really don’t like something that much, don’t waste energy “hating” them/it. Use that energy in a positive way and direct it towards doing something good or spending your time doing something you love.

Just a suggestion for all you “haters”.

It’s much more fun loving something than hating something.

And much more rewarding.

How much clutter do you have in your life?

I’m not just talking about possessions.

What about your friends? How many of them suck the energy from you? Friends can either give you energy or take energy away from you. I think it’s important to evaluate your friendships. Sometimes your best friends are energy takers – but if you’re aware of that and are ready to accept that, then the friendship can work. If you’re not, well maybe it’s not a good idea to still be friends with that person.

Have you ever heard someone say to you “I’m being mean to you because I care about you?”

Well I think that’s bullshit. If someone cares about you, they should be supportive of you and encouraging of what you do. Even if it’s in their character to be critical, if they truly care about you (and that admiration is a positive thing) then they will be positive and supportive.

If you are surrounded by too many critical and negative people then your life will feel very critical and negative and it will be tiring. You might even start being more critical of your friends.

If you’ve ever heard of the book/movie/etc called “The Secret” (which ps it’s not) then you’ll know that your energy will attract similar energy. If you’re super positive then you’ll attract positive people and vice versa. However, it’s entirely possible to be super positive yet attract negative people. But that’s the great thing about life – you have a choice as to who you surround yourself with and who you choose to be in your life.

So choose wisely. Because it’s much better having positive supportive people around you.

How often in life have you had a project on the go and another one came along that seemed more appealing?

How often have you met someone who seemed totally awesome and then you met someone else who seemed even more awesome?

How often have you bought something only to see a similar product that seems even better?

If you have, you’re not alone. I like to sum this up in a simple quote –

If you chase 2 rabbits, both will escape

Too many times in my life I’ve found myself always seeming to chase something or someone. I’ll meet someone great but then meet someone else who is equally as great and then I end up losing both of them. This has happened a few times and I’ve been aware of it every time. But it still happened. I’ve realized that the way to make sure it doesn’t happen is to simply be happy with what I have instead of always trying to think about what I don’t have.

It’s the same with work, family, play, etc. It’s about having a balance in what you do. I absolutely feel when my life is out of balance so when I get to that point, I re-evaluate what I’ve committed to in order to regain my focus on what is important. The past few days I’ve been doing that again realizing that some things are important to me and I want to focus more on those.

How do you keep your life in balance?

So I have an issue with the problem of charities, causes and companies who make a difference yet their success depends on their ability to market.

If you’ve read Freakonomics, you can get a bit of a sense for what I’m talking about. For example, people are more afraid of guns killing children than children drowning yet way more kids drown in swimming pools than are killed by guns.

In a similar (but much less morbid) way, a company like the Canadian Red Cross’s success for blood donations doesn’t depend on the actual impact it has on our lives but rather on the Red Cross’s ability to inform the public about donating blood. However, their tagline “Blood – it’s in you to give” is such an accurate line that I wish more people would realize just how important it is to donate and go on a regular basis; not simply when they feel compelled after seeing a commercial.

As well, when the earthquake hit Haiti, the world came together in a huge way and sent a ton of aid to those in need; however, what about all the people in our own country and cities who need our help? Why don’t we help them out instead/as well as?

I’m all for helping causes that matter but I think instead of being influenced by marketing and being told that “for less than a dollar a day…” etc, we should instead really think about what we care about and support those causes – either with our time or our money. There are so many reports about how organizations don’t allocate the money they receive very evenly (ie too much goes to administration costs) or how a lot of the money never reaches the intended target due to legal issues so instead I think we should think more locally where we can be sure that our help will have a real impact.

We see so many commercials but if everyone wants our money perhaps don’t give it to anyone; instead why not give them our time? Just a thought.

Sweet potato fries.

Tri-ominos.

Good friends.

Cute puppies.

Good music.

Ultimate frisbee.

Water.

More good friends.

Seriously.

Every Wednesday at the Joyce on 4th in Calgary. There are other places too (all owned by the same group of owners). But what a fantastic idea. 1 cent ribs. And then of course they make all their money off the beer and pop. Pfffft. But still.

How would you feel if you went out for 7 cent ribs and I told you I was only spending 1 cent on my ribs? Would you feel ripped off? Because I think it’s awesome.

When’s the last time you could buy anything for 1 cent? 1 cent candies haven’t been around for years. They’re now 1o cents most places – some still offer them for 5 cents, but 1 cent? Not a chance.

The next time you’re eating 7 cent ribs, I ask you…what would you do with an extra 6 cents per rib?